Tuesday, November 24, 2009


What do you do when you don’t know what to do?
You do what you have to do

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Its been long
So long indeed
But then there hasn’t been anything happening
I don’t know
May be you could help me
I just don’t know what to think any longer
Is it going to come
Not come
Who the hell knows
Don’t ask me what to do
I can’t tell you
Even if I knew what to tell you
You wouldn’t be able to handle it
So quit asking
As there is no telling

Friday, September 25, 2009

Swishing her tail in heaven

Today my cat, my baby went away to cat kitty heaven. Tommy Leanne as she was so fondly called, was more than just a cat to me or us. She was family and will always be.

Here’s to Tommy Leanne D’souza

Missing you
I cannot remember when the last time was
I went home and you were not there
Meowing, vying for my love
Till I gave you all

I know you lived more than a full life
But I still wish you enjoyed more
But I now know you are free

Thank you Tommy for:
Listening to all my heartbreak stories
Silently understanding things that no one else did
Being my best friend, always sticking by my side
Never complaining
Having them ready-to-heal licks
Letting me rub your belly
Letting the little ones - Luanne, faith, Nathan pull your ears and tail
Always finding an excuse to rub yourself against me
Being my flower-cat at my wedding
Accepting Bonnie into the family
All the happy memories

Love you baby! Rest in peace.

Monday, September 14, 2009

ironic change

Posted by Picasa

Sans Wings!

So tell me how does one manage to get kicked out of heaven?

Angel: Kicked out of heaven!?
Puleeez… (showing the finger to heaven’s gates)

I walked out, rather.

(Flash! A camera bulb goes off.)

Angel: Actually lots, I mean hundreds, no make that million of people are leaving heaven.

Why? Simply because we got bored.

There’s nothing to do! All day long either chat with nuns, priests, or newborn children who had no chance to sin. They don’t have any entertaining stories to kill the boredom.

I don’t know how I got to be in heaven.

Well I sat and I stared at the angels, and damn some of them are sizzling hot!

But guess with God being such a bore, we were not allowed to indulge in any fun.

No looking also!


Can you believe that?

Well I looked and I started thinking and when I started thinking I started…

Beep. Beep-Beep. Beep. Beep-Beep-Beep. Damn f&*%@$* alarm.

Uh… where am I?
where are my wings? Goddammit!

Monday, September 07, 2009

Thursday, August 20, 2009


I’ve not solved the problem that’s the problem
- G3

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

another day

Zzz. Beep! Snooze. Damn. Hurry. Motion. Repeat. Stop. Play. Think. Forward. Pause. F&%$. Ouch. Blur. Stop. Caffeine. Play. Shut. Refill. Wash. Plonk. Zzz.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

sayin it the way it is

Are you from the f@%#ing advertising industry?
You bet f@%#ing I am!
Now is that f@%#ing good, or is that f@%#ing bad?
What am I supposed to f@%#ing make of it?!
Who f@%#ing cares anyway?

F@%#ing rule number 1:
Your success in advertising will depend on the f@%#ing number of times you can use the word f@%# without having the next person react to it!

Now what is f@%#?
Urban dictionary defines it as. (f@%# Oxford or Webster’s!)
1. The universally recognized "F word"
2. N. Implying complete and utter confusion
3. N. a really stupid person
4. V. To procreate
5. adj. Can be used to modify any word for more passion
6. Int. Expresses disgust
7. Int. Expresses complete surprise and joy
8. adv. Can be used to make a command more urgent

Make a note this people. F@%# is the only word in the English language that can form a grammatically complete, stand alone sentence.
In your face F@%#ers

Or like how… I would normally say it DUMBF@%#s! (rolling my eyes)
Of late I’ve been:
filing my nails every 4 hours,
making faces at the computer,
staring at the black ball in front of me,
ogling at the ugly guy for no good a reason,
e-stalking people (some who I don’t even know),
typing then retyping the same thing over again,
spinning my wedding ring,
having the sudden urge to fight global warming,
scratching the lamp post,
making a death wish,
making a list of all the people (in my case clients) I would like kill,
uttering curses and profanities at the clock,
realizing facebook is so superficial,
wondering why people sitting next to each other tweet instead of talking,
stare at my phone wishing it would ring,
hating my phone when it rings,
wondering what Suri is up to today,
contemplating what’s in store on gofugyourself today,
starting things and not completing them,
infected with boredom!

Friday, August 07, 2009

artwork by my husband

Who is left?

First he went
Then you got married and left
You left for further studies
Then you left too
And you left just because you felt like it
Then I left
Then you followed me
Oh he also left
I knew you would leave
When did she leave
What’s happening dude, why is everyone leaving
Oh you are leaving too
When is your last day
I feel like leaving, but where do I go
Everyone is leaving, I need to get out!
I don’t know why everyone is leaving
I want to leave
So that brings me back to…
Who is left?

Monday, August 03, 2009

Pure evil thoughts

Baby pigeon with a note:
"I am too dumb to figure out that I am a bird. I could fly!"

(evil laugh! evil evil laugh)

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Her again!

She sat there again
Sheltered from the rain
Playing with a stick
And shivering like wick
Lost in a world of her own
And no place to call home

So old
So frail
A mean world
Who threw her out
When there was
Nothing to gain

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

a little money, a lot of heart

An old man
An old lady
Across each other
Hunched over heels

One for you
One for me
One for you
One for me

A rupee that you threw at me

There was so little
And eyes filled with pain
A heart full of despair
An a day without a grain

Transfixed I sat
Chilled to the core
My heart went out
But I could do no more

Friday, July 17, 2009


I am not a writer
I am an artist
I dabble with words
I play with colour
I am confused
I like words
I love colour
I like paper
I love canvas
I am missing drawing
I amazement of my own artwork
I miss painting
I need to paint
I need to do it right now

Thursday, July 09, 2009

my wellingtons


The ugly names I’ve been called!

Jaw lean
Ju lene
Jew lean
Jaw Line
Joo lene
Jolena Seriously WTF!
Johnny?!! FFF

Here’s for all you dumbf@$#s
And bl**dy well stick to the pronunciation, or just call me JO!

How to pronounce Jolene:

Phonetic Pronunciation: joe-LEEN

And in case you are still feeling alphabetically challenged,
click here to hear the pronunciation

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

lets learn your A, B, Cs...


Tuesday, July 07, 2009

talk to me

i don’t want to do
what you ask me to do
but the problem is
i too don’t know what i want to do

if i knew
what i wanted to do
would i be here
confusing you?

maybe it’s the aliens
interfering with the network
the signals are all wrong
and we are f&%$#d!

no it’s not the aliens
it’s the voices in my head
no i guess it was you
talking, to me?

so long

It’s been so long
I forgot what you look like

It’s been so long
I forgot what I said to you

It’s been so long
I forgot how nice it feels talking to you

It’s just been so long
I promise not to ignore you any longer

I promise to come back sooner

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

27 - 20

tada! That leaves you with 7 things you could get me.

So here’s what I need in order of priority.
1. A scooter.
2. Iron maiden flight 666 DVD (special edition) (I think my husband is getting me this, do check with him first)
3. Croc gumboots in pink, size 5.
4. A yellow i-pod nano skin.
5. A red i-pod nano skin. (yes you read 2 colours, not either or)
6. 2 tickets to Egypt
7. A Harley Davidson t-shirt or sticker.

Ok that’s all I can think of right now. If there are any modifications to my list I will let you know.

Friday, June 05, 2009

white / yellow

Looking back
I cannot put a finger
On one thing
That could have been different

Everything was perfect
Everything fell in place
Everything was a dream come true
And it was all because of you

All yellow
All white
More yellow
More white

With family
And friends

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

for the first time

it feels like i am about to get married
it feels weird
and a little scary

the memories come flooding back
the fights with my baby brother
the keep out signs on my room door
the thinking long walks to the watering hole
the evenings spent with cousins
waiting for Papa to pick me from the bus stop
the "hungry mama" as soon as i reached home

every room holds a special moment
every wall has a story to tell
i see
growing up
falling down

something is special here
something is special about this place
this place that i call home

Saturday, May 09, 2009


is just another ordinary day.
i glass painted.
i am happy.
i dont want to get back to work.
i dont want to get back to mumbai.

i just want to stay here.
i want to paint.
i want to fly free.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

after almost 4 years...

today I will leave the hostel.

so much has happened in these 3 years 9 months.
as much as i hated the place with its weird rules, i really enjoyed my freedom here.

that day, the 31st of july 2005, i was very apprehensive. never before have i stay in a hostel. i heard weird things happen, but luckily over here nothing of that sort happened.

i was luck to have my friend Neefa, my friend from school & college as my roommate. And we literally ignored the other person. i really missed her when she left a year back. it was so boring.

laughter & tears
sadness & joy
heartbreak & love
so much so much happened

i will really miss the freedom
i will miss my room
i will miss monday dinner (chinese food, my fave)
i will miss the late nite calls
i will miss khadeeja & some of the friends i made

i am not sad. i am happy. and glad for the time i spent here. it made me the person i am.
independent, stubborn and freeeeeeee

ben 10

bonnie's fave cartoon.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Never go to sleep angry

Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.

But who is going to speak first?

Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.


Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.

Does texting count as talking?

Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.

Umm but it’s not my fault, is it?

Never go to sleep angry.
Never go to sleep angry.

And it isn’t your fault either.

Never go to sleep angry.

Friday, April 24, 2009

damn mobiles

i hate mobiles. but also cant live without them. this was done on one of those days i was wondering why i have a mobile.

green world?

is it really a green green world


red on silver or silver on red, cudnt really decide

girls vs boys

you can hate them but you just cant ignore them
i love boys. but i hate them too ;P


just some of the things that make me, me


done at the back of my notepad during the brainstorming sessions at work

inspiration mehendi

was traveling in the train, this is inspired by the mehendi designs on one of the many ladies hands.

about me

just felt like doing something about me.
the intricate design is almost like the thoughts in my head

an apple a day

this was done when i was dieting
and damn are fruits expensive!

tommy leanne dsouza

the family feline
and a much loved meow to all of us

meow meow

i love cats :)

There was a girl...

I couldn’t ever fathom how anyone could walk so fast on any day
“Who was this weird girl?” was all I could say
Would she ever be my friend one day?
Puff. Duh! No ways!

Wrong I was to the very core
This weird girl I saw that day
Soon came to be my best girl friend till today

The shee baba’s
The jango-bango’s
The monishagiri’s
Are just some of the things
I learned from her along the way

Thoughts as pure as an angel
While people might want to debate that
I for sure know that
There isn’t a single bone in that pretty lady
That’s ready to throw a stone!

A very few times in life comes a friend
Who knows what you think
And how far you will go
There’s no pretense
There’s only laughter, a smile and memories to hold

Do I consider myself lucky?
Do I consider myself blessed?
One thing is for sure
Is that life wouldn’t have got to where it was
without that “Go Jo… Go Jo”

Thursday, April 23, 2009

pissed off!

I don’t know who to be angry on?
I don’t even know if I have a reason?
I just hate people don’t respect my space.

Thursday, April 16, 2009


just that leg is itchin like hell & cant scratch it ... argh

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

what's in a name

What's in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes

- Shakespeare


Sunday, March 29, 2009


nothing at all
no emotions
at all

am i supposed to be excited?
am i supposed to be sad?
am i supposed to be nervous?
am i supposed to feel something?

nothing at all.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

just yesterday

It was just yesterday that I was a little girl
All I had to do was play
Today I am not so little anymore but…
I just want to play in the mud
With my imaginary friends
Eat dirt.
Eat chocolates.
Get pampered.
And go out to play again.
Want to stitch clothes for my dollies.
Pretend to ride my papa’s scooter.
Play with my baby brother.
Dress him up and pretend he was my little sister.
I want my drawings adorning the fridge door.
I want a treat from grandma.
I want to play with my Barbie’s.
Also want to rob tamarind from grandma’s store room.
Fight with my cousins and go tell mama.
Not make any decisions.
Tell mama what my brother did.
I want to play with Tommy.
I just want to be that little girl.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009


In the wrong profession.
And hate it with a growing passion every single day.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Devils inside my head
Pounding at my teeth
Drilling at my ear
Battered by drugs

Tuesday, March 10, 2009


Cold hearted b*%#@!
Who me?

Thursday, February 26, 2009

no issues

A Virgo will say, ‘Think things through and don’t be so emotional about it’,
A Cancerian will reply, ‘But can’t you feel what I’m feeling?’

Friday, February 20, 2009

my little boy

A cute little boy
Came to me
And i knew i could not
send him away

Cause I knew
From day one
He was going to be
Special to me

And no matter
How big he grows
How strong he becomes
How smart he gets
How handsome he turns out to be
How many hearts he breaks
How far he goes

He will still remain
My cute little boy
To me

Thursday, February 19, 2009

A conversation - A Bride-to-be and her Son...

kiddo: hows my mommy

me: excited
how u doin
lil bo y

kiddo: now i'm little boi...

Me: oh god delvin
seriously r u on dope
is werner makin u do stuff

kiddo: hahhaa

Me: BTW u can thank me for the extra room in our new house
u can come stay with us
thank u very much wud be appropriate

kiddo: thanks...
so for the wedding i don't have to hunt for accommodation...

Me: no u dont

kiddo: and after u guys av a place i get my own room

Me: yes
wot col do u want me paint it?

kiddo: bluegreenyellow

Me: ok

Me: one ground rule tho

kiddo: also i would like it furnished with a water bed...72" lcd tv...PS3 with 5.1 JBL surround sound...
and the room should be sound proof
also one punching bag with 2 sets of gloves...

Me: all that u can with ur own money

kiddo: yup my own money that my mommy jo will give me...

Me: plus no girls allowed for sleepovers

kiddo: so wot the rule?
k kewl...

Me: no girls allowed for sleepovers

kiddo: will make sure they don't sleep...

Me: or if they there ur door needs to be kept open or u both sit in the hall

kiddo: hmm the hall sounds like fun...
not too kewl wit ppl watchin me...while i'm entertaining my lady friends...

Me: oh u'll have ur great grandparents watchin ur every move too
this is gonna be so much fun

kiddo: well i don't mind givin em tips...
but showing them wot to do is jus a little beyond me...

Me: eeeks

kiddo: hahahaa

Me: i c u r gettin worse sitting there
u need a good whopping

i ate

green peas today for lunch



now a plant, not one but many will start to sprout from my tummy!


1. Chocolate
2. Bread
3. Vada pav
4. Pepsi
5. The new 7up lime
6. Grilled chicken (whole)
7. Crabs
8. Chips
9. Tang
10. Parathas
11. Chutneys
12. Curries
13. Coffee
14. Ice cream
15. Chinese food
16. Soups with macaroni
17. Noodles
18. Pickle
19. Sauce
20. Gherkins
21. Biscuits
22. Jalebi
23. Tacos
24. Fried chicken
25. Fried fish
26. Prawns
27. Rice
28. Pastry
29. Fries from McDs
30. Croissants
31. Bagels
32. Pizzas
33. Sodas
34. Lollipops
35. Sizzlers
36. Balchao
37. Bibinca
38. Sausages
39. Urulai chops
40. Missal pav
41. Masala Dosa
42. Hamburgers
43. Popsicles
44. Caramel Popcorn
45. Hot dogs
46. Samosas
47. Sorpotel
48. KFC
49. Chicken Biryani
50. Chicken rolls

Monday, February 09, 2009

my 6th of the 6th!

taking a cue from diti.
this pic is the 6th one from my 6th folder titles pics.

coincidence? but this is also my fave pic.
this cat is family - Tommy Leanne Dsouza. and she rules our home in goa. now that my bro and I are not staying at home any longer, this feline has become the apple of my mother eye!

Here are the rules:
1.pick the 6th picture from your 6th photo folder.
2.tell the story around it.
3.pass it onto 6 other people you like.

And these are my 6 fave people:

Peekacho, my adorable cute brother who does nothing but still manages to piss everyone off!

Knight of eden, the man makes sure I remind him to check my blog

Diti, for her super fantastic perspective on daily things and the idea to this post. I am truly in awe of your pics!

Monisha, for her crazy ramblings, age defying methods and inventor of the term "jango bango"

Tanaya, who disgusts the things I like, by default!

Yatin, who showed me where hard work can take you.

do u c what i c?

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

yellow is the new pink

i take colour seriously!
chrome yellow medium has been my all time favourite.

and as always when i have these colour mood swings, i do my my supporters who take it a notch higher.

so here it is as the world now turns yellow...

this is mangesh and his fulltoo support always

and this is choksi lending her support too :)

oh and did i tell u, i got yellow pumps, a bag and bangles!

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

That phase again

Where I feel lost
Don’t know what I am doing
Don’t see where I am going
Can’t really figure out
Where I am headed

May be I just need time

Friday, January 02, 2009


How does one say goodbye to a year?
Wait till midnight and as the clock strikes 12 scream Happy New Year?!
I find it weird yet still that’s the way it’s done.

Anyway the end of this year
I for one dint sit on the steps to my house
Looking up at the stars and wondering
When will I have that someone special
To hold on to and do all the crazy new year stuff
That people normally do

I for one was having a blast
With my wall-e, bonn-e
A small house party
Some booze
Good home-cooked food
Music from the 80s
More booze
Brought in the new year

It’s the New Year.
A year when I am to be married
And that much closer to being
with the one I love
Exchange of kisses
More drinks
And hurray let’s roll….
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