Monday, November 24, 2008

The beginning of all times

Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden. They were both naked. They were the very first humans. And they were pure although they were naked. They had never managed to do anything wrong, ever. That meant that they were totally inexperienced. They didn't know that doing naughty things can sometimes be fun. They didn't know that you sometimes feel guilty afterwards. They had no idea that being naked is embarrassing. Adam and Eve also didn’t know that wearing sexy underwear can be more exciting than being naked.

Anyway Adam looked at Eve’s tits and he had no idea what to do with them. Adam looked at Eve’s pussy and he had no idea what to do with that either. Eve looked at Adam’s little wang. Perhaps that excited her. But she had no idea what that could do either. Perhaps she did.

Anyway, along came this talking snake. The snake spoke to them and said,

Hey, look! They're naked!

Serpent: "Holy ssshit! I can ssspeak!"

"You can find out all about things if you eat some tasty fruit from this lovely tree."

Eve: "God told us we shouldn’t eat fruit from that tree."

Serpent:"Come on don't be pussies."

Eve: "God said if we eat that fruit we'll DIE on that same day."

Serpent:"God was just making that up. Of course you won't DIE."

Eve: "Er well.... we're not sure."

Serpent: “If God didn’t want you to eat that fruit why on Earth did he put the tree there? You don't think God is Evil do you?”

Eve: “You think God really wants us to eat it?”

Serpent:"You want to find out about everything don't you?"

Eve: "Well...perhaps... The fruit really looks tasty."

Serpent:"if you eat that fruit you'll be like God and know what God knows. That'll be cool, really cool."

Nobody had told Adam or Eve that disobedience is wrong. So rather than saying "OMG, IT'S A TALKING SNAKE" and running a mile, they ate that tasty fruit. And ta ta! then they knew what to do with each other. And they got excited. And they fished. Afterwards they got embarrassed. And they covered themselves up. But that didn’t help them. They just weren't inocent any more. They stayed dejected in the garden and waited for God's wrath.

What do you think happens next?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...